Sticks and stones may break my bones,
But words will never hurt me.
You probably heard that adage, or something similar, when you were a child.
I remember saying those lines many times, in an attempt to ward off unkind words. It wasn’t much of a defense.
Because it isn’t true. Words can hurt.
Words are powerful.
Words—so innocent and powerless as they are, as standing in a dictionary, how potent for good and evil they become in the hands of one who knows how to combine them.
Nathaniel Hawthorne
I was reminded recently how important it is to watch what I say. The world is full of negative words, words that reject, hurt, and dishonor. Words that crush hopes, sour relationships, instill fear.
I want my words, spoken or written, to counteract that negative force. Because words can also restore hope, heal relationships and bring courage. Those are the kind of words I want to speak. The kind of sentences I want to write.
Unfortunately, the people we want to encourage don’t always make it easy, do they? Sometimes they act in ways that are downright annoying—or worse. But even in those moments I can choose to refrain from speaking negative words. I can choose to keep unkind thoughts to myself.
Words are like eggs dropped from great heights; you can no more call them back than ignore the mess they leave when they fall.
Jodi PicoultWhen you have spoken the word, it reigns over you. When it is unspoken you reign over it.
Arabian Proverb
Business experts say people work better in when positive comments outweigh negative ones at least 5 to 1. Other experts claim it takes ten positive comments to outweigh one negative. Whatever the ratio, it is clear that we humans need more positive words in our lives.
Which means I need to be intentional about speaking positive messages, not just now and then, but every day. As often as I can. To as many people as I can.
My problem is not that I have difficulty saying nice things to people. I enjoy doing that. But I so often forget to pay attention.
Before you can say something nice to the waitress, or pay your eight-year-old a compliment, you need to observe something positive to comment on. Some people seem to have trouble noticing anything positive anywhere.
My problem is that I need to pull my thoughts away from my mental to-do list and whatever conversation is currently going to inside my head and actually pay attention to what the people around me are doing. Then I can notice the snappy service and say something like,” Wow, thanks, you brought that coffee really fast.”
Or to a store clerk:
“Thanks for being so helpful.”
Or to my friend/spouse/child/parent/cat:
“I am so glad you are in my life.”
Who knows how important those few simple words might be.
You can change your world by changing your words… Remember, death and life are in the power of the tongue.
Joel Osteen
So where can you speak positive words today? Who do you need to call? Or text? Or email? Is there someone who could use a card, or even a sticky note with a few happy words?
Go ahead. Make someone’s day.