OOPS!
I don’t like to make mistakes. I want people to think I am smart and capable and on top of things. I tease my children by claiming I am always right—and a piece of me wants this to be true.
But of course it isn’t.
Like all humans, I make multiple mistakes each day:
- Picking the wrong line at the grocery store
- Blurting a tactless comment I regret afterwards
- Forgetting to stop at the library on the way home
- Tripping over the laundry basket.
So why is it so hard to admit I make mistakes? Because somewhere along the line, I equated mistakes with failure. This attitude leads me to I avoid situations where I might make a mistake, and puts pressure on me to cover up those I make anyway.
Not exactly a healthy way to live, is it? And certainly not the kind of attitude where creativity and innovation flourish.
Sometimes when you innovate, you make mistakes. It’s best to admit them quickly, and get on with your other innovations. ~ Steve Jobs
A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. ~ George Bernard Shaw
Embracing mistakes
Accepting mistakes as a healthy part of life gives us:
A way to learn what works and what doesn’t. This is the basis for all experimentation. Some results are good, some are not, but in both cases the knowledge is valuable.
The courage to think outside the box. To risk. To try new things. We may suspect that attempting swing dancing or karaoke night will be a disaster, but if we allow ourselves to look foolish, we may find that A) we enjoy the experience and B) after a while we get better.
An opportunity to grow. When we see mistakes as an opportunity to face our fears and admit our weaknesses we set ourselves up to learn valuable lessons, which lead to character growth.
A mistake is only a failure if you don’t learn from it.
In fact, sometimes “mistakes” turn out to be brilliant–but only if the person saw past their failure to the worth of whatever they accidentally created. (Examples include penicillin, saccharine, the microwave, sticky notes and silly putty.)
Are you afraid to make mistakes? Maybe–like me–you need to rethink that attitude and embrace the messy, scary, but ultimately rewarding life where mistakes are OK. Have fun. Takes risks. Embrace mistakes.
When I was in school, a long time ago – – well at least 3 years ago – – I had an English teacher that I despised, he had a saying that always rubbed me the wrong way: “I may not always be right, but I’m never wrong!”
Many years after the fact I found my self using that very phrase with my sailors. I realized that what he said wasn’t arrogance but leadership. I may not always be right – meaning that he was human and made mistakes. But I’m never wrong – Being the teacher and in the position of authority his words were the rule. As a Senior Chief in the Navy I found that I was not always right, but in my place of authority I had the realization that my orders – as long as they were lawful (and I always kept them lawful) – made me to be never wrong. I don’t know how many years that it took me to realize what Mr. Hayes was saying, but I wish I would have had the opportunity to go back and visit him before he passed and let him know that I finally got it.