By the time we reach the over-fifty mark, we have acquired a lot of stuff. Physical stuff. Habits. Attitudes. Values. Responsibilities. Etc. etc.
Much of it is useful. Some of it is not.
Just as we need to clean out the refrigerator now and then (unless growing rare and fragrant mold is your hobby) so we also need to clean out other areas of our life. The problem is most of the stuff in our lives doesn’t go green and furry when we’ve kept it around too long. We need to be intentional about reevaluating from time to time to determine what is still beneficial and what is simply taking up space (physical, mental, or emotional). Because when we allow stuff that doesn’t belong to hang around, it weighs us down and hinders our ability to enjoy a satisfying life.
But letting go of stuff is hard. We’re afraid to let go of some things. We feel guilty for getting rid of others. And who has time to sort through the piles of stuff anyway?
A change in mindset can help
I don’t have any qualms about tossing moldy or rotten food. I may feel a twinge of guilt for not eating it before it went bad, but I am quite certain that anything moldy, slimy, or stinky doesn’t belong in my fridge.
I think that’s the key—seeing it as something that doesn’t belong. When I know certain stuff doesn’t belong in my house, I have no problem getting rid of it. If we can switch our thinking from stuff that is mine to stuff that doesn’t belong in my life, we will have an easier time letting go.
Suggestions for determining what doesn’t belong in your house, your schedule, or your inner life.
- Does it belong to a previous stage of life? Outgrown, out-of-fashion, or what-I-wore-in-my-previous-job clothes. The bunny hutch from ten years ago. Habits that made sense before you retired. Expectations for decorating or party-hosting that require more energy or agility than you now have. …
- Does it still work? Pens that don’t write. Power cords to unknown appliances. Parenting strategies that no longer motivate the kids. VHS tapes. Audiobooks on cassette. Garden clippers that are so dull they mangle rather than cut. …
- Is the interest still there? Magazines you used to devour but now hardly touch. Hobbies you or your kids no longer enjoy. Volunteer positions that no longer stir your passion. Clothes, décor, or art you used to love (but now it’s only meh) …
- Unhealthy associations. Snack foods we know we shouldn’t eat. Mementos that bring painful memories. Nicknames or self-labels that are hurtful (to us or others). Anything that reminds us of shame or failure. …
- The motivation for keeping it is guilt. It can be super hard to get rid of something that is still perfectly good. But is it good for you? If I buy a bag of chips and decide I don’t like the flavor, I am not going to force myself to eat them. I admit my mistake and move on. We shouldn’t let the guilt of buyer’s remorse or false aspirations enslave us to things or expectations that don’t work in our lifestyle or don’t fit with who we are.
Try one small step
Letting go of what no longer belongs is a life-long process. We’re all in the same boat here. We all have stuff we don’t need. No guilt. No stress.
Simply practice letting stuff go. One thing, expectation, or belief at a time.
If you find it hard to let go, maybe these quotes will help.
Sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on. ~ Eckhart Tolle
Many wealthy people are little more than the janitors of their possessions. ~ Frank Lloyd Wright
You can’t reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday’s junk. ~ Louise Smith
Kathy says
Thank you, Lisa, for this thought-provoking and helpful post! 🙂
Lisa E Betz says
You’re welcome. This is a life-long a battle we all face, but sometimes we don’t realize how much unnecessary stuff we have weighing us down. May you let go with joy.