What’s a holiday without a party? We all love festive meals and holiday celebrations—until we are faced with hosting one…
Whether you are tackling a dinner for four or a party for fifty, hosting guests can be stressful. We may dread all the work that goes into throwing one, including:
- Menu selection
- Food prep
- Handling special dietary needs
- Housecleaning
- Festive decorations for house and table
- Seating arrangements
- Serving
- Activities
- Clean-up
- And more
- Not to mention all the people-energy required to keep everyone happy during the event
Some people have a natural talent for being a gracious hostess. The rest of us may find even small gatherings intimidating.
That doesn’t mean we can’t host successful parties. Neither does it mean the not-so-gifted hosts among us are doomed to high stress whenever we open our door to guests. We may simply need to adjust our mindset and approach.
7 suggestions to help you find more joy while hosting holiday events
- Clarify your goal. Before you start, decide why you are hosting this event. (If your goal is to impress the guests, see #5. Otherwise, read on…) Think about who you are inviting and why you want them to come. Remember your primary purpose as you plan and prep. Don’t waste too much time, energy, or angst on details that are not critical to your primary goal. People will still enjoy themselves if you forgot to dust the picture frames. They might not if you work yourself into a frazzle and have no energy left to be pleasant when they arrive.
- Know your limitations (and accept them). Choose to work with them rather than fight against them. Limited energy? Break the tasks into pieces over several days. No time to cook? The opportunities for buying tasty pre-made food are almost endless these days. In addition to Costco, caterers, and delis, quite a few restaurants now offer party menus. Stop trying to do the impossible and instead enjoy whatever you can do. (Also see #7.)
- Be yourself. Do parties your way instead of the trying to copy your mother, older sister, or a disgustingly talented chef-friend. Some people go all out on fancy wines or elaborate table decorations, but maybe you’re the no-fuss, no-fancy type. So what? A party works just fine without fancy stuff. Hosting the kind of party that fits your personality will make the whole process more enjoyable.
- Learn how to play to your strengths. Which items from the list above turn your stomach into knots? Which ones do you generally enjoy? Which ones can you accomplish without breaking a sweat? Make trade-offs so you can do more of what you enjoy and less of what stresses you.
- Focus on connecting not impressing. If you are able to relax and enjoy your company it will help everyone else enjoy themselves too. (And isn’t that the point of a party?) Set a cheerful, welcoming tone and consider what will help your guests relax and have a good time.
- Find places to simplify. Trim extras from the menu. Opt for simple-to-prepare or make-ahead foods. Scale back on the decorations. Shorten the guest list. Shorten the duration of the party… Every little bit counts. Simplify and conquer.
- Ask for help. It isn’t always practical to tackle a party as solo hostess. Find ways to team up with friends or family that can share the load. Many people are willing to pitch in if you ask them for help with a specific task. Some guests will be happy to share their love of food by bringing a dish. Those who love to decorate or organize activities may be delighted to help with those chores. There are even folks who enjoy cleaning dishes. (I am not one of them!)
I hope these ideas will help you face your holiday hosting with more joy and less stress. Happy partying!
