“I’m sorry” are two of the most powerful words in the English language. We do well to use apologies freely and sincerely. But there are times when we utter apologies in situations that don’t call for it.
You and I are who we are—strengths, shortcomings, values and all. We don’t need to apologize for being who God made us to be or for standing up for our beliefs. We don’t need to apologize for having the same frailties as other humans. We don’t need to feel guilty for being better at something than the person next to us.
Instead, why not choose to be content in our own skins and proud of our values and accomplishments? Why not choose to resist the temptation to deal with uncomfortable moments by claiming to be sorry for things we don’t need to be sorry for?
Ten situations where we don’t need to apologize.
- You are not perfect or omniscient. Really, we’re not. None of us. So why do we allow others to expect that we are? (And then apologize when we fail?)
- You have legitimate physical needs. We get hungry. We get tired. We get sick. This is normal. You are not a slacker because you need more than four hours of sleep per night, and you are not high-maintenance when you give yourself time to recover from an illness. You don’t need to apologize for taking appropriate care of yourself.
- You are not superwoman. All humans are bound by the laws of time and space. We have a finite amount of energy and we cannot be two places at once.
- When you find something easy that others find difficult. Don’t apologize for the talents God gave you or the skills you have acquired. They are part of what makes you you. Own them with pride, just don’t hold others as less worthy when they don’t share your particular abilities.
- For doing your job (and doing it well). Sometimes doing your job runs counter to someone else’s agenda. This is not your fault. In those moments, we must remain professional and do what we know is right, regardless of how others feel about it. No apologies needed.
- When you choose not to follow the crowd. It is not easy to follow the beat of your own drum. It takes courage, purpose, and perseverance. Stand tall.
- For not giving to every worthy cause or friend that asks. We all have limited resources. We should be intentional about giving what we can to the causes that line up with our values, and simply informing others that “We have decided to give elsewhere.”
- For not pleasing all the people all the time. First of all, it’s impossible. Secondly, it’s not your responsibility. In fact, pleasing people was not why you were put on this earth to begin with. Loving, yes. Being kind and forgiving, yes. Making them happy at all times, no.
- When you stick to your beliefs and values. Not because we are right and they are wrong, but because living honestly means following our beliefs. We can maintain an open mind without feeling guilty for not agreeing with another’s tenets.
- For having dreams. Big, audacious dreams. Maybe you will achieve them, maybe you won’t. But a life without dreams to chase is not a fulfilling life. Don’t apologize for yours.
