Life changes. We got older. We have a baby. We move to a different state. The world as we know it is shattered by a pandemic.
Some of those changes are temporary. Others rock our world so that we can never go back to how it was before.
When the big changes come and we realize there’s no going back, how do we cope? How do we avoid becoming mired in disappointment and bitterness?
Here are suggestions to help you make the best of things and move forward.
Five steps to move forward into a new normal
1 Accept that change is a fact of life.
The first step to embrace change is to recognize that change is both normal and beneficial. There is an ebb and flow to all of life. Some changes are welcome while others aren’t. Such is the way of our imperfect world.
If life never changed we’d all be stuck exactly where we are now. That’s not what I want! Change brings variety. Change enables us to grow and improve. Even the changes we aren’t happy about.
2 Come to terms with your new reality.
A new normal means we’ve lost the old normal. There are aspects of our life that won’t return to their previous state. For example: When we become a parent for the first time we discover a multitude of ways in which the new baby complicates life. We can’t go back to the simpler pre-baby existence where car seats, diaper bags, and nap times weren’t necessary. .
We ’ll never move forward until we own our new reality—shortcomings and all. If we want to blossom in the new normal we must accept the limitations that come with the territory, whether that means no more playing cards until two am or accepting that we need reading glasses to decipher the menu at restaurants. (Letting go of the old normal may involve going through a grieving process. If your change is traumatic, you may need counseling to move past it.)
3 Focus on what you can change rather than what you can’t
By definition, a new normal means there are things we’d like to change but can’t. The aging process, for example. No amount of wishing or shaking my fist at the universe will alter the fact that my aging eyes can no longer read without glasses. I can’t reverse the aging process, but I can adapt my approach to reading by wearing reading glasses.
When we face a new normal, we are better served expending our time and effort looking for ways to adapt. We can learn new habits. We can find strategies to cope with new challenges. We can adapt our living environments to help us overcome handicaps. What can you change that will help you live a more satisfied life in your new normal?
4 Look for what works well rather than seeking substitutes for the old
Gluten-free bread will never be as good as a crusty loaf of sourdough. If I set my hopes on finding an exact replacement I’m setting myself up for disappointment. The new normal of gluten-free flour simply doesn’t lend itself to the texture and flavor of wheat-based bread. I’ll be happier person if I expend my energy experimenting with what gluten-free baking can do well instead of forever being frustrated by what it can’t.
It’s all about outlook. We can focus on how the new normal falls short of the old, or we can explore new possibilities within the realm of our new normal. It may mean letting go of some old favorites, but it also means making room for new experiences and activities that can bring us joy.
5 Choose to be grateful anyway
There are positives and negatives in every situation. Which would you rather focus on?
If we look for the blessings in our new normal, we will find them. It may take time to see them, but they are there.
I trust that God is capable of creating beauty and blessing out of everything that happens. He is in control and I can choose to rest in that fact and look for small things to be thankful for in the midst of a new normal. I can be thankful that reading glasses are a simple and painless way to adapt to aging eyes. I can be thankful that gluten-free products are readily available at the local grocery store. I am thankful for technology that enables me to stay in touch with friends even when we can’t be together. What are you thankful for in your new normal?
We humans are resilient. We can adapt and overcome again and again. We can learn to thrive in our new normal if we have the mindset and the resources we need to adapt.
What are your biggest challenges in embracing your new normal? What mindset tweaks could help you find more joy and satisfaction?
Brilliant post, especially given what we are all experiencing currently.
I, like most, am looking forward to some normality but I worry about the levels of change we will all face. This is a reall helpful post that makes the changes seem less scary x
I have been wondering what implications this whole thing will have since the lockdown first happened. I’m sure we can learn to function but it’s sure going to feel different for a while. However, I believe in choosing to look for the positive. I hope you find peace in your new normal.
Thanks for sharing this post, exactly what we need to know, since we’ve entered into a new normal. ❤❤❤
Yes, this time we’re all facing a new normal together. I hope you can stay safe and sane as you find your way.
Thank you! The word ADAPT sits clearly on my note board. I choose to adapt, but at times need the reminder. Thanks for sharing this great post!
To adapt is so often the right answer, but it’s not so easy to accomplish, is it?
We brace ourselves for all the changes, the new normal perhaps. And i agree we should be all ready for it , think positively and be grateful each day. Nobody knows hows it gonna be, but we will be ok for sure.
You’re right. No one can predict how things will settle out, but we can move forward in confidence and a positive mindset. Thanks for visiting.