Dare To Be Dull

In our image-conscious, success-driven world, dull means failure. You don’t want to be ordinary, so-so, or boring. You want to be brilliant and productive, a sparkling success.

But you know what? We can’t all be number one.

Sometimes, when we give up on striving to be the best, we actually make room to thrive. Instead of striving to be the most brilliant or accomplished person in the room, we may be happier and more successful in the long run if we have the courage to be our “dull” and ordinary selves.

Sometimes, by daring to be dull, we actually enable ourselves to shine brighter.

Here are 5 ways I dare to be my “dull” self.

Choose cozy over chic

I admire photos of beautiful houses as much as anyone. But honestly, I don’t want to live in perfect house. Or perhaps more truthfully, a perfect house doesn’t fit my lifestyle and values. I don’t want to spend tons of money on top-quality home decor and I don’t want to expend the energy required to keep things looking perfect.

I am content with my nice-enough furniture and my random collection of pictures that may or may not be ideal for the space. I would rather lounge in a house of lived-in furniture than worry about scratching a perfectly polished surface, and I’d rather spend more time reading and writing than keeping the house photo-shoot tidy.

Write my story not the next Pulitzer winner

Some writers create lyrical prose, gorgeous descriptions, or plots so twisty no one can guess what will happen next. Some authors crank out one book after another in what seems an astonishingly short time. If I compare my writing to those authors, I will fall short every time.

So I must remind myself that I was called to write the books on my heart. In my style. With my voice and my worldview. I will choose to be content with the book I am able to write, even if it is never destined to hit the best-seller lists. I will choose to focus on pleasing the audience that does like what I write rather than worrying about what the rest of the world may think.

Remain clueless about what’s cool

I don’t pay attention to popular culture. I don’t watch the hot shows or listen to hip music. In fact, I don’t know what shows are hot or what bands are hip. I don’t know because I don’t pay attention, and I don’t pay attention because I don’t care. I am clueless about what’s current or cool, and I’m OK with that.

Sometimes this lack of knowledge leaves me out of conversations. Sometimes I miss the joke when it’s based on popular culture. Oh well. I’d rather fill my brain with obscure facts about ancient history, materials science, or the behavior of cats. And that makes me happy, even if others find those subjects dull.

Choose quirky over sparkling

I occasionally feel jealous of those who always know what to say, and can shine in any group conversation. I frequently don’t know what to say, especially around strangers. And the more I focus on my lack of naturally sparkling conversation, the more self-conscious and tongue-tied I become.

However, when I relax and quit trying to impress others with my razor wit and brilliant insights, I can usually overcome those first awkward moments and bring my own quirky brand of humor to the conversation. Not everyone gets my humor, but that’s OK, too.

Ask for wish lists

Some people have a knack for selecting the perfect gift for any occasion. I am not one of those people. When it comes to shopping for gifts, I am usually bewildered about what to buy. I am color-challenged, fashion-challenged, and oblivious to what is “in” (see above). For this reason, I am a big fan of detailed wish lists.

Yes, picking something off a gift registry or wish list is as dull and unromantic as it gets. But it relieves a ton of stress and I know I’m not wasting money on something that won’t ever get used.

Admit your weaknesses and embrace dullness, I say!

How can daring to be dull help you ease your holiday stress levels?