Try Saying It Out Loud

Every day a million things go through our heads: sensory inputs, feelings, choices, worries, problems to solve. How can we process all this mental material, make sense of it, and use it to make wise decisions? Sometimes talking out loud helps.

Some of us are wired to process verbally. When my husband wants to think through an issue, he likes to talk about it. Verbalizing helps him clarify his thoughts. I have other family members who deal with emotions best when they can talk through emotionally charged situations. Relating the story that produced the emotions helps them process what happened and why they feel the way they do.

I am not as prone to share my thoughts and feelings with others, but I recognize that talking through problems and ideas is a powerful tool for all of us. Talking out loud forces our brains to transform fuzzy ideas or roiling emotions into concrete words, which helps us clarify what’s going on inside our heads so we can make good decisions.

Verbal processing has other benefits. It can be therapeutic to talk about our feelings and frustrations to another. And sometimes hearing our own voice say something can open our eyes to what is really going on inside, leading us to identify unhealthy attitudes and twisted logic.

5 ways to tap into the power of verbal processing

1. Find a listening ear.

All of us benefit from a trusted person who will listen as we talk through an issue or vent after a rough day. The best listeners are ones we can trust to keep our confidences and who will listen without judging or trying to fix the problem right away. Talking face to face is best, but a phone call works, too. Choosing the right person to be your sounding board is important, so a phone conversation may be the best option.

2. Try oral journaling.

Tons of people talk about the many benefits of journaling. But writing in a journal isn’t for everyone. Some people find writing difficult, and others don’t like the idea of writing enough to make it a habit. If so, try journaling verbally. Instead of writing out your thoughts, dictate them. You can use the record app on your phone or an old fashioned tape recorder, although honestly, recording them is optional. The act of speaking will help you solidify and clarify your jumbled thoughts regardless of whether you record them to review later.

3. Tell a pet

I spent many a childhood moment telling my woes to my patient cat. A pet can be a great listener because they love you now matter what you say to them. The never interrupt, correct your grammar, or judge you for having a bad attitude. Don’t let anyone tell you talking to animals is foolish because they don’t understand what you’re saying. Those people are missing the point. Pets can help us overcome the awkward feeling of talking out loud to ourselves. Therefore, they can be effective listeners who help us open up and say what needs to be said.

4. Talk and walk.

I’ve written about the benefit of taking a think walk. This is just one step further. (Pun intended.) Talking through a problem out loud while I take a walk has proved a very effective strategy. It helps me work out story problems even better than walking silently. Very simply, as I walk, I talk about the problem, looking at if from different angles and following the what-ifs and cause-and-effect links. I’m fortunate to have a nice path in the woods where no one can see me talking to myself. If you don’t have that luxury, you can try talking out a problem in your car, your room, or even in the shower. Alternately, you can stick a bluetooth in your ear and pretend you’re on an important phone conversation.

5. Find a trained counselor.

Sometimes we can’t fix our problems alone. When we deal with deep inner issues or life-changing traumas, we may need a trained listener who can guide us through the processing of complex thoughts and deep emotions. A good counselor can help us make sense of things, and guide us to healthier ways of thinking, and enable us to heal past hurts.

Final thoughts

What do you need to process verbally today? Pick one of these options and talk it though out loud. You may be surprised at how much it helps.