Do You Need A Better Definition of Purpose?

The world values things like wealth, power, image, security, accolades, and being number one. The world’s definition of purpose is to earn our worth by chasing after these things.

In contrast, God values humility, service, kindness, forgiveness, submitting to one another, and surrender. We were not created to achieve worldly success, but to honor and worship God.

These two concepts of purpose are in direct conflict with one another. If we don’t want to conform to the image of this world, we must quit determining our worth and defining our purpose based on the world’s standards.

We need intention to remind ourselves that our worth is based on our identity as children of God. We need intention to jettison the unhelpful beliefs that urge us to strive after all the things the world values, the things that win us accolades, acceptance, and approval.

We are surrounded by messages that draw us away from our God-designed purpose. Here are three common pressures and how to fight them.

The pressure to produce

If we are accustomed to proving our worth through accomplishment, our definition of purpose may be to win the most awards and recognition. Thus, we feel the constant need to have something to show for our efforts. If we don’t produce, it means we’re lazy—and we all know laziness is bad. Therefore we must use every moment to get things done, because the one who accomplishes the most wins.

This is not God’s way.

Remember Mary and Martha? This story illustrates that we often have skewed priorities about what is most important to “get done.” As Martha learned, the actions that impress others are necessarily the actions that most honor God.

Some problems with basing our purpose on achievement:

• Accomplishments can become an idol or lead to unhealthy workaholism.
• Basing worth on accomplishments means we are never enough. We must always hustle to produce more and prove our worth again tomorrow.
• Busyness can become a coping mechanism to avoid facing relationship issues or inner wounds.
• We can spend our time doing “good” things while failing to accomplish the best, most important things.

Mindset shifts to overcome the pressure to achieve

• Ask “who benefits?”
• Ask “who am I trying to impress by doing this?”
• Redefine what is “productive” using God’s perspective.
• Intentionally include time in your schedule for “non-productive” activities. Things that feed your soul but don’t produce a tangible product. For example: playtime with kids, self-care, date nights, and creative hobbies.

The pressure to win acceptance and approval

If we are accustomed to proving our worth through the approval of others, our definition of purpose may be to get as many people as possible to like us. We would then fear criticism, rejection, or shame if we don’t keep everyone around us happy.

But it is impossible to serve God with our whole heart, mind, strength and soul when we are focused on keeping other humans happy with us.  

Remember, we are in a battle. Nobody enjoys facing the disapproval of others, but Jesus himself warned us it would happen. “If they hated me, they will hate you also.”

When we set our minds and hearts on how much God loves us, we can thrive even when people reject us.

 Some problems with basing our purpose on winning approval and acceptance:

• We were created to honor God, not keep other humans happy. Winning approval or popularity can become an idol that draws us away from serving God.
• What makes one person happy will annoy another. It is impossible to keep all the people happy all the time.
• When our goal is approval, we “lose” every time our kindness is not acknowledged. Our success is at the mercy of others.
• No matter how hard we try, we will never be enough or accomplish enough to win some people’s approval. (This is a red flag signaling a toxic relationship.)
• When fulfilling other people’s expectations is our goal, it leads to overcommitment, lack of healthy boundaries, and eventually burnout.

Mindset shifts to overcome the pressure to win approval:

• Redefine your purpose by aiming for God’s approval over man’s.
• When we focus on acting honorably instead of winning approval, we “win” every time we are kind to others regardless of their behavior towards us.
• Ask, “Is this relationship feeding my soul, or draining it?” Is a relationship that demands you compromise your values really worth it?
• Ask, “Is this relationship a top priority?” Stop wasting time trying to win the approval of people you barely know and don’t rely on.
• Realize that some people are impossible to please and give yourself permission to stop trying.

The pressure to want more

If you are accustomed to proving your worth by wealth and image, your definition of purpose involves acquiring as much valuable stuff as possible.

Every advertisement reinforces this goal, telling us we need their something to be happy, healthy, and successful. Satan has been using this trick to keep us discontent since the Garden of Eden—and it still works today.

Some problems with defining our purpose by acquiring more:

• It breeds discontent, ingratitude, envy, and a never-ending quest for more.
• We base our life satisfaction on material objects and immediate gratification
• We are constantly comparing ourselves to others, which leads to dissatisfaction with all we have and are.
• We fixate on what others have that we do not.

Mindset shifts to overcome the pressure to want more:

• Practice gratitude. Take time to remember all the ways God has blessed you and thank him for those blessings. This helps you trust his provision more.
• Practice generosity. Giving your money and stuff away is a wonderful antidote to greed.   
• Redefine what is truly “valuable” in your life. Relationships and meaningful activities feed your soul far more than wealth or image.

Bottom line. Does your definition of purpose serve you and honor God?

Living intentionally means redefining our worth and purpose. The world wants us to conform to its image of success, but God calls us to a different standard. Our worth and life purpose are not based on our own efforts but rather on God’s love, provisions, and plans.

Want a more intentional life? These seven foundational concepts will help.

1. You are in a battle (whether you know it or not)
2. You have Agency (so use it wisely)
3. Know yourself and your core values
4. Regular reflection is critical.
5. Adopt God’s definition of self-worth and life purpose
6. Every Choice is a trade-off (whether you are aware of it or not)
7. Prioritize wisely