Anybody besides me have a closet full of half-finished craft projects? Or a habit of starting webinars but not completing them? Or a gym membership you’ve not used in three months? We all struggle to follow through on our good intentions. One factor that helps me go the distance is to know why it matters.
Do you know why it matters?
Scientists have been studying what motivates people for decades. One key finding is that external motivators such as money, recognition, pleasing others, or avoiding guilt only go so far. The people who are able to dig deep and push through obstacles rely on inner motivation.
They don’t give up because they know the goal they are working toward is aligned with their deeply held values and dreams. In other words, they know why it matters to them that they get to the finish line.
Companies recognize the importance of this principle. They spend big bucks coming up with corporate vision statements because they know their employees will be more effective if they understand what matters most and why it matters.
You and I don’t need consultants and snappy vision statements. But if we want the kind of motivation that will get us past obstacles, we need to know why it matters to us that we achieve the goal we’re trying to achieve.
Because if you can’t articulate meaningful reasons why you want to accomplish something, you’re much more likely to give up when things get painful or when unforeseen obstacles rear their ugly heads.
How to find a more meaningful motivation
Let’s say you are trying to build a habit of exercising more often. A worthy habit, but why are you doing it, and does that reason have enough staying power to keep you going when the going gets tough?
Here are some possible “Whys” I might come up with to motivate me to exercise more.
I should exercise more because I want to look good. – This isn’t a compelling motivation for me. First of all, “should” is a red flag that my reason is based on pleasing some person or societal expectation rather than my personal internal values. Who says I “should” and why does their opinion matter to me?
Also, “looking good” is vague. How do I know if I’ve achieved it? Finally, image and style aren’t high on my personal priority hierarchy. So, this motivation won’t get me far.
The doctor said I need to exercise more. – This reason at least has a link to my health. But as I stated earlier, motivation based on guilt or duty tends to fail in the long run.
I need to build my stamina for an upcoming vacation. – Now we’re starting to get somewhere. Let’s say I’m planning a week of hiking in the mountains this summer. I want to enjoy myself and keep up with my kids and spouse. These are meaningful and personal reasons why it matters that I exercise. It may not make exercising tomorrow any more fun, but when I remind myself why it matters, I’m much more likely to get off my butt and start walking.
I want to keep fit and limber so I can play with my grandkids. – This is another good motivation. Spending time with my grandkids is a high priority for me. Obviously, I want to be able to enjoy my time together as much as possible. Also, I’ve witnessed the disappointment of others who are not physically able to participate with grandkids as much as they would like. So, this is a meaningful motivation for me.
Knowing why it matters helps define better goals
Another problem that can cause you to get discouraged during big projects is getting too fixated on achieving your sub-goals and losing sight of what really matters.
Some productivity experts claim you must create goals that are specific and measurable. However, other experts suggest setting an intent instead of a fixed goal. I think that when it comes to personal growth, specific goals can be too constrictive and distract you from your key motivation.
Take the goal above about staying fit and limber. I could decide to meet that goal by attending yoga class three times a week. But yoga class is only one of many options that would help me move toward my end goal of staying fit.
Remember, my ultimate goal is not becoming a yoga expert but rather staying fit. So, instead of forcing myself into the box of yoga classes, I can broaden my options and make a declaration of intent, such as:
I will take action each day that leads me toward my goal of staying fit and limber.
Do you see how this opens up so many more options to succeed each day? And the more you and I feel successful, the easier it is to stay motivated.
When we know why it matters, it’s easy to turn our reasons for pursing the end goal into a clear intent that will guide us toward positive actions each day.
For more on this concept of setting an intent, check out this TED Talk by Colleen McCulla
Where do you need to bolster your sagging motivation?
If you are struggling to stick with a new habit or complete a tough project, spend a few minutes considering why it matters. Dig deep and see if you can find a meaningful reason that will help you keep going during the inevitable rough patches.
PRO TIP: Even if we know why it matters, when life gets busy, we can lose sight of our reasons. One simple solution is to put reminders where you’ll see them. A sticky note on the mirror may seem cliché, but it works. Where can you place objects—such as a photo of a loved one—that will remind you why the effort is worth it? Be proactive by putting positive messages in your daily life to boost your motivation.
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