Is Your Stuff Weighing You Down?

Living with more joy and less guilt means letting go of the stuff that weighs you down. Frequently that excess baggage come from unhelpful beliefs and unhealthy mental habits that keep us from a fuller and happier life.

But sometimes the stuff that weighs us down is actual stuff.

Here are 9 categories of actual stuff you might have in your house or workplace that could be weighing you down. Which types of stuff do you need to declutter in order to find more joy and less guilt?

9 types of stuff that weigh you down

1 Things that portray a false version of you

Have you ever seen a person dressed in chic or trendy clothes, but they look ridiculous because the style was totally inappropriate for the person?  (Like a fifty-something wearing teen styles.)

You don’t want to be that person!

Nor do you want to fill your home or workplace with stuff that you only purchased because you think will impress other people. Instead, fill your home with things that express your own taste and values. The more your home portrays your family’s true personality, the more comfortable it will be.

2 Things that belong to an old version of you but are no longer appropriate

Whether you have made radical changes to your values and lifestyle or have simply matured and moved from one life season to the next, there will be possessions from the old you that no longer reflect the new you.

Like a snake shedding its skin, you need to jettison items that no longer fit who you are.  That stuff is taking up room and weighing you down instead of helping you, so it’s time to let it go.

3 Stuff you’ve decided you don’t like

Everyone purchases things, only to discover the items weren’t what they expected. (And even more so when you order online.)

Why frustrate yourself with items that don’t work, doesn’t look good, or  or suffer through

Remember the Marie Kondo maxim: Does it spark joy?  This is sort of the opposite: Does it make you frown? And if the answer is yes, why on earth do you still have it in your life? Getting your money’s worth is not worth  it for most purchases, if every time you use it you grit your teeth or feel ugly.

4 Items that spark negative emotions

Sometimes we associate an item with a particular person, event, or concept. Sentimental items are items you’ve associated with meaningful memories or people.

However, you may have items in your life that spark negative emotions, such as guilt, regret, or a sense of incompetence. For example, I had a certain coffee mug that always made me feel like an incompetent writer. I didn’t know why, but I did know the feeling was real. So, I sent that mug to Goodwill, where someone else can enjoy it without the emotional baggage.

Please do the same. You don’t need a rational explanation in order to know that a certain item causes you unease. Just let it go.

(Some people can use a negatively charged item as a motivation to overcome, but for the rest of us, the sooner it’s out of our lives, the better.)

5 Free stuff

From happy meal toys to event T-shirts to “free gift for subscribing” items, you and I collect a pile of free stuff. Some of that stuff is actually useful, but most of it is not. A lot of it is cheaply made, isn’t something you use, or promotes a brand you don’t particularly care about.

Why let it clog up your life?

6 Items someone gave you that you don’t want or don’t need

These fall into three main categories:

• Personal gifts, such as birthday presents, event goodie bags, or office holiday presents
• Things helpful people gave you because they thought it would be good for you
• Hand-me-downs (everything from clothing to furniture)

While I acknowledge that sometimes we keep a gift to avoid hurting someone’s feelings, the reality is that many of those gifts—no matter how well-intended—weigh you down. They clutter up your spaces, make you feel bad that you don’t love them, or otherwise impede you from making the best use of your time and space.

You are not obligated to like something just because someone else gave it to you.

You are not obligated to read/watch/use/eat something just because someone else said it will be good for you. (Consider how much you trust the giver’s wisdom and understanding of who you are on this one.)

7 Things you wish you had the time (or motivation) to use

Now it’s time to get really honest with yourself. You may wish you were the sort of person who read Shakespeare, or knitted handmade sweaters, or enjoyed kayaking.

But you haven’t gotten around to it it in the last two years (or ten years), so there the stuff sits, taking up space and making you feel vaguely guilty every time you trip over it and are reminded of your good intentions.

Reality says your priorities and interests lie elsewhere. That’s OK.

Give yourself permission to quit trying to be that idealized person and instead focus on who you are in this season of life. Give that stuff away and move on.

8 Things that tempt you

Things that fall into this category include:

• Junk food (or drink)
• Any movie/book/magazine/music/game that takes your mind to an unhealthy place.
• Items that tempt you to do an unhealthy activity
• Stuff that distracts you from focusing when you need to. (These items may need to be relocated rather than tossed.)

The easier you make it to practice good habits, and the harder you make it to continue bad habits, the better. Control your stuff instead of letting it control you.

9 Items you’re saving because your kids or grandkids might want them

It’s a nice thought, but today’s society no longer sees possessions as things that must be passed down to later generations. On top of that, a modern understanding of health risks mean that today’s parents probably view your cherished antique bassinet as a safety hazard.

Don’t take it personally.

Instead of making assumptions, you need to have frank conversations with family members regarding which items they would love to own someday and which they’re not interested in.

Don’t continue to hold onto items you no longer need, and other family members no longer want. How much better to donate them to someone who can make use of it now.  

It’s time to act

What good is stuff that weighs us down with guilt, or gets in the way of using our time and space to its potential? If you have items that fall into the categories above, why not do yourself a favor and donate those items this week. You’ll be glad you did.