Some of you may have missed my last post. Because I forgot to write one. My excuse? I’ve been consumed with a big project—renovating a new house and then moving into it. That’s right. We’ve moved from the community we’ve been a part of for many years. It’s a big change, and I’m still adjusting.
The Big Change
My husband and I decided to move from the house we built and have called home for 34 years into a smaller house near our son and his family. (Anyone else know that the pull of grandchildren is the most powerful force in nature?)
In addition to sorting and decluttering and packing and cleaning at the old house, we’ve been busy doing major renovations to the new one. We hired contractors for the main work, but over the past six months I’ve painted most of the walls in the new house, in addition to all the little home improvement projects we’ve done on weekends.
All of which required a LOT of trips back and forth.
Since the move, I’ve been focused on unpacking, organizing, arranging, decorating, and trying to figure out where I put the instant-read thermometer.
Throw in a week teaching at a conference, several days disrupted by workmen and loud machinery, and two out-of-town weekends, you can see why I’m feeling a bit behind and discombobulated.
What’s next?
That’s the big question.
The last six months have been a whirlwind of planning, painting, packing, and procurement missions. [I haven’t yet found the local Target, but I’ve visited many of the building suppliers in the greater Harrisburg area.]
Now the move is coming to an end and I’m facing the next season of life.
With no clear destination in sight. Ugh!
It’s a little unnerving, even though I’ve known it was going to happen.
It didn’t seem so daunting when I could keep busy, but now that the last piece of new trim has been painted and most of the moving boxes are empty, the unknown future is looming.
I am choosing not to panic. Instead, I’m trying to embrace this season of liminal space.
What is liminal space?
A time of change from one season, purpose, or personal reality to another.
“It’s the space between the old story and the new one — it rarely comes with a roadmap and often comes with a feeling of lost.
Liminal space is deeply uncomfortable for many — so much so that people often make choices or take action not because it feels aligned, but simply to escape the discomfort. Anything to get out of the vast unknown and move on, even if it’s not quite right.” – Kim Egel
As the above quote implies, one of the keys in this in-between season is not to rush it. To accept discomfort and choose patient reflection and exploration over anxiety and the urge to fill my schedule with nonessentials and misaligned goals.
Here are some of the ways I am navigating this season beyond a big change.
Take time to rest
Any time we engage in a big project or a big change, we expend lots of energy and dip into our reserves. Not just physically but emotionally, mentally, and socially.
For our move, we’ve been forced to make hundreds of decisions. Which countertop to choose, which books to donate, what do we need to fix before we sell the old house …
All of which is mentally and emotionally exhausting.
We’ve also made sacrifices socially, first because we were too busy and now because we no longer live near our old friends.
All of these expenditures add up. The Lord has made it clear to me that I need a slow period to rest and recharge before I head into whatever projects await.
Embracing a season of rest isn’t easy for most of us, but I am listening to my body and my spirit and seeking ways to rejuvenate what has been depleted.
Take time to reflect
One of the reasons rest is so important is that if gives us time to reflect, listen to our souls and notice the nudges and whispers of God.
I am intentionally creating a rhythm of spiritual practices to allow God’s transformational work to occur (whether I can feel it happening or not).
I trust that as I take things slowly, the direction ahead will begin to emerge. I have seen this happen in former seasons. When I resisted the urge to find things to fill my schedule, I was able to slowly add meaningful work and say yes to unexpected opportunities that the Lord brought my way.
“The absence of structure, the loss of familiar roles and routines, creates a kind of openness. It is in these transitional times that many people report the deepest personal growth, the most significant shifts in how they see themselves and their lives. The threshold is where transformation happens, precisely because the old structures have fallen away and the new ones have not yet taken their place.” – Meridian University
Take advantage of new opportunities
The liminal period after a big change offers opportunities for new beginnings.
We’ve been jarred out of our old ruts. Instead of pining to go back to the old normal, we can embrace this chance to begin new, intentional habits. One I’m trying to establish is taking a walk around the block after meals.
This season can be a time of intentional exploration. We’re in a new place. We’ve stepped down from the duties of the old season. Why not take time to poke around and see what’s here? Try some new activities. Hike some new trails.
What does life look like beyond the big change?
I don’t know yet, but I am facing each new day with gratitude and faith, fully confident that fulfilling new purposes and wonderful new friends await. I will find them, all in good time.
PS. For those who are curious, here are a few pics of the home renovation project.
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