It’s that time of year when cozy images of fireplaces and mugs of cocoa appear in our media feeds, the lyrics of songs, magazine covers, and everywhere else. Is it just a holiday tradition, or could it be that coziness is good for us? Here are my thoughts on why we should intentionally seek coziness, (but without taking it too far).
When I hear the word cozy, it brings to mind being curled up on the couch under a soft blanket with a purring cat on my lap and a good book in my hand (warm beverage optional).
What is your mental image of cozy?
Coziness—a balm for the senses
“Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand, and for a talk beside the fire: it is time for home.” — Edith Sitwell
Notice all the sensory details in the quote above. That gives us a hint about creating coziness, it’s partly a matter of atmosphere. What our five senses take in affects our mood and state of mind. Our environment can add tension or soothe, demand alertness or help relax. Therefore, if we want to enhance coziness, we need to choose the right sensory details, as the picture below illustrates.
This fact that our atmosphere affects our mood and state of being is the concept behind hygge, which Google defines as: “a quality of coziness and comfortable conviviality that engenders a feeling of contentment or well-being.”
Want to up your hygge factor? Posts like this one and this one give suggestions for how to increase the coziness of your spaces.
3 good reasons to seek coziness
Coziness is beneficial because it offers a break from all the hectic, busy, stressful, tiresome aspects of normal life. A safe place to slow down, recharge, and reconnect.
“If you’re feeling a little burned out, taking a break can help recharge your wiggly bits.” Kate Toon in Confessions of a Misfit Entrepreneur
Coziness benefits us emotionally
When we are in a space that feels comfortable, inviting, and soothing, our brains release the feel-good chemicals dopamine and serotonin. This causes stress to lower and allows us to relax more, which improves our mood and sense of well-being, which in turn allows us more space to gain perspective and realign our emotions.
“Sometimes the most important thing in a whole day is the rest we take between two deep breaths, or the turning inwards in prayer for five short minutes.” Etty Hillesum
My cat helps me do this. She will randomly ask to be picked up. As I stroke her, she snuggles into the crook of my neck, purring. I welcome these moments to get out of my head and enjoy the wonderful sensation of connection with a creature who loves me. I have been training myself to not only enjoy the brief snuggle with a soft, furry creature, but also to say a silent prayer of thanksgiving about my day.
Coziness benefits us physically
Unfortunately, our modern world tends to keep us in a constant (and unhealthy) state of stress and alertness. We are surrounded by too much physical stimuli and it depletes our mental and physical batteries. A cozy atmosphere offers an antidote. A soothing, calm space signals the body that we are safe. This allows us to shift from the state of heightened alertness to the relaxed state (the parasympathetic realm) which allows our body to repair and regenerate.
“If you neglect to recharge a battery, it dies. And if you run full speed ahead without stopping for water, you lose momentum to finish the race.” Oprah Winfrey
Coziness benefits us socially
Connectedness is one of the key elements in flourishing and a cozy environment encourages connection. When we feel safe, relaxed and happy, we’re more likely to open up. When we’re comfortable and content, we’re more willing to invest time in a real conversation.
Think of the ambience of a candlelit dinner vs. a fast food joint. The first is designed to make you want to linger, while the latter is designed to move you along so the next customer can have your table.
So, if you want to encourage quality conversation with friends, get cozy.
“In measurable and well-documented ways, social capital makes an enormous difference in our lives…Social capital makes us smarter, healthier, safer, richer, and better able to govern a just and stable democracy.” -Robert D. Putnam
When is seeking coziness not a good thing?
When it becomes an obsession or an excuse.
We seek coziness to recharge and reconnect, but we aren’t meant to stay in our cozy bubbles forever. I think this pair of quotes from Anne Lamott captures the balance between good cozy and too cozy.
“Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes, including you.”
“It’s good to do uncomfortable things. It’s weight training for life.”
It can be tempting to stay in the cozy zone. For example: I almost didn’t write this post because the cat was sleeping in my lap. She looked so peaceful, and I was so comfortable, it seemed a crime to get up.
A silly example, but you get my point. We must not let the siren call of feeling comfortable distract us from important work or facing challenges. We don’t want to stay stuck in our comfort zone and never grow. But we should allow ourselves time to recharge there.
“When you recover or discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in your life.” — Jean Shinoda Bolen
Did you hygge today?
When was the last time you slowed down and enjoyed a few moments of cozy contentment? Maybe you need to seek a little more coziness in your world.
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